Celebrating The 40 Year Honeymoon: Ben

The other day I was able to ordain a new member of the Church as an Elder. I gave him the line of priesthood authority showing the priesthood was given to me by my father. I am grateful to have had such a wonderful example of a steady, righteous priesthood holder throughout my life. Not only has it blessed me and my family but now carries on into others people’s lives and will bless their families as well.

I am thankful to a mother who always sustained and supported my Dad as the priesthood leader in our home.

Mom has shown me the true power of motherhood and has taught this to Heather as well. Together they showed us that one cannot be strong without the other.

Because of their loving example, Heather and I teach this principle in our home. The influence of mom and dad on me will be seen through my boys and their children.

Deep down I probably always knew Mom and Dad were right even when I told mom I was going to call CPS because she was so mean and Dad slaved me in the yard and on job sites.

Now I work with kids who really were saved by CPS and I have a deeply ingrained work ethic that has accelerated my career. It’s all mom and dads fault. Thanks for being patient, setting firm limits, and teaching the value of hard work.

Love,
Ben, Heather, Jack, Will, Rowan, and Truman

When I think about Mom and Dad I remember playing outside the window where mom would let me and Ben make huge mud puddles and play in them smearing mud all over ourselves until mom would come out and tell us to stop making such a huge mess.

I remember them taking us camping to strange a beautiful places.

remember being raised on honey and carob and fresh milk from a farm. We would go with mom or dad to the nearest Co-Op to get honey and fresh milk. Dad used to play fun games with us in the snow, he taught us how to play 'Fox and Geese' in the snow. We would bring in big bowls of snow in the winter and we would poor milk and honey into the snow and eat it.

We would go down the street to the nearest swimming hole in the woods and would play with frogs and crawdads and dad would help us build little dams and wading pools.

I remember mom getting bored out of her mind on some days, so she would load us into the van to go swimming in places like Arrowhead Lake. I remember mom making homemade candy from honey. She would show us how to pull it and pull it and pull it like taffy until it became like a caramel.
We’ve had a garden just about everywhere we’ve lived and I remember working side by side with both of them growing vegetables, fruits and herbs. One time in the McCrary house in NC we had to clear a spot for the garden and I remember having fun clearing shrubs and digging up holes to make the garden.
Dad always had a firm but loving hand in the way that he raised us. Like when we’d get in trouble, he’d always lecture us very sternly and then explain the why’s of the consequences and so would mom. There were always good lessons in everything they taught us in gardening, reading and planning together as a family. Dad always read us good and interesting books, he used to love to read us stories.

Looking back on it, reading to us like that was probably a good way of keeping us in a good home with good values instead of us being out and about getting into trouble.
They would always teach us good values out of the scriptures. Even to this day they’ll round whoever is home up for scripture study. They always taught that serving a mission wasn’t just a good idea but a commandment from the Lord. They tried to teach us all good manners and a dignified way to dress and act properly. They always taught us to have good manners and to be respectful when in guests’ homes. We would learn responsibilities from feeding the dog, washing the cars or having doing the dishes on our “dishes night” or fixing meals. I have mom to thank for not minding doing dishes so much these days in fact I find it almost therapeutic. If mom hadn’t talked me into doing dishes when it was my turn all the time, I would probably hate doing them now. None of us would have made it to be Eagle Scouts if it weren’t for mom.

I know they always tried to help each one of us through the hard times in our own lives. Whether it was tough times at school or trouble with boys and girls at school or just growing up, you know growing pains and the like.
Mom and dad always taught us that if you have a goal or something in mind that you want you have to reach out and grab it and take it. Whether it’s career oriented or a talent or skill that you want to acquire.

You know like my art. In fact artwork has become a running tradition in our family because of that. I guess that what I’m trying to say is that they taught us to work for what we want to accomplish, for our goals, and if we do it’s a lot more satisfying. If you don’t have to work for something then it’s a lot easier for it to fall by the wayside and you won’t appreciate it. You have earn your own way in this world, you can’t just have things handed to you. Thank you for teaching me all of these important life lessons and how to be a good parent. I love you guys.

Love,

Darby